YOUR GUIDE TO AUTHENTIC DATING

Practical tips to go from

confused to confident

in your love life

Get one step closer to your dream woman

YOUR GUIDE TO AUTHENTIC DATING

Practical tips to go from

confused to confident

in your love life

Get one step closer to your dream woman

Previous Issues of The Newsletters

5 Ways to Stay Out of the Friendzone

5 Ways to Stay Out of the Friendzone

July 17, 20249 min read

You don’t get put in the friendzone by every woman, just the women you’re actually into.

Which almost feels worse.

You start to question if you’re going to have to lower your standards to find love.

Every time you hear “You’re a great guy, but…” from a woman who seemed interested at one point, you start bargaining with yourself. The thought crosses your mind, "Should I just be okay with potentially being single forever or date a woman I’m just not that into?"

The true answer is – neither. At least not on my watch.

But if you stay in this mindset, you’re going to get yourself into a disheartening cycle of “no’s” and “not now’s.”

You’re way too good of a guy to not get your dream woman.

She deserves YOU! The type of man who can make her feel so loved, safe, and special.

But you’ll keep missing out on her when you don’t understand what creates polarity with a high-value woman.

When you understand how to create safety and attraction simultaneously, without playing games or using tactics, you stop getting stuck in your head, second-guessing every text you send, and treating her like your girlfriend way too soon.

Connecting with your dream woman from a place of authentic confidence is the only way to build a lasting relationship with her.

You know when you hear men say, “We just had this natural connection, it felt effortless”?

That’s what you can have when you follow these five ways to stay out of the friendzone.

1. Focus on connection, not affirmation

The top thing blocking polarity with your dream woman is neediness. And the number one display of neediness is searching for affirmation.

A woman will feel your need for affirmation when you…

  • Wait for her to text you first to see if she’s interested

  • Give her a compliment or gift or tell a joke to try and get her to like you

  • Try to follow the “rule book” to gain her affection

  • Ask her where she wants to go or what she wants to do to avoid making a decision

  • Texting or calling her because you worry she'll forget you or end up with another guy

  • Making jokes about physical contact to see if she gets the “hint” and makes a move herself

When you ask her to affirm you throughout the dating process, she doesn’t feel led. And when she doesn’t feel led, she isn’t able to relax and get into her more playful and flirtatious sides where polarity naturally builds.

When you focus on connecting with her, you can confidently lead the dating process and inspire her to open up.

To create moments of connection, you have to first identify what it is you want in a partner and how to qualify her to see if she fits what you’re looking for.

Next, you need to segment these desires into “needs for affirmation” and “desires for connection” by asking yourself – What do I hope to gain from this interaction?

2. Lead from your desires

If you’re a “by the book” kind of guy, this one’s for you. We’re throwing out dating rules because they only keep you stuck in your head, which is your problem to begin with.

The most attractive thing a man can do is go after his desires with authentic confidence. To do this, you have to stop downloading texting books and take accountability for your own choices.

So once you’ve identified what your desires are in dating (refer back to #1), it’s time to live them out.

Sounds simple enough. But here’s where you will get tripped up.

We all have what’s called negativity bias. And when you haven’t been able to get or sustain the relationship you want, your inclination to look out for signs it won’t work out will be high.

If you notice that every time you try and lead from your desires you talk yourself out of it or do it and then get friendzoned, it’s because of your limiting beliefs.

Your limiting beliefs are thoughts and stories you’ve inherited over time that have created your “truth” or the way you see the world.

But just becuase you think it doesn't actually make it true.

When your subconscious limiting beliefs are at odds with your conscious desires, you’ll continue to push away the women you want the most.

This is why I take all my clients, whether they're in a customized VIP private program or in Masculine in Love, through a rewiring process first.

The process is simple. But until you do it, your dating efforts won’t change your results.

3. Step into “chosen energy”

Do you ever find as soon as you start dating a woman other women notice? Or how when your work schedule gets busier you have an easier time getting to the third date with women you’re into?

This is because you’re harnessing “chosen energy.”

High-value women are attracted to men who have options. This doesn’t mean you need to have women chasing after you. Your options don’t have to just be other women.

You access your chosen energy when you have priorities outside of pursuing her that are inspiring and mission-building in your life.

A lot of men confuse this with not caring. This is why you’ll hear the false advice, “She’ll come into your life when you stop caring.”

A woman may come into your life when you stop caring, but she likely won’t be the right one.

Remember, being intentional is the top thing a high-value woman will look for.

When you don’t care, you attract women who chase. Women who chase are emotionally unavailable, in wounded feminine or masculine energy, and have unregulated insecure attachment tendencies.

It’s not about caring less about her, it’s about caring less about her affirmation and more about seeing if she fits into the life you’ve worked so hard to create.

4. Avoid the “Dopamine Dating Cycle”

One of the biggest traps I see high-performing men get into in dating is the “Dopamine Dating Cycle.”

When you’re in this cycle, it can feel like you’re into control.

Any time a woman friendzones you, you brush it off quickly and go on the hunt for another date.

And any time you notice a woman seems interested in a relationship with you, you start to question if she’s the right one for you.

It’s not that you’re afraid of commitment. You want a relationship with the right woman.

But it just feels like you can’t find her.

And you won’t when your dating life is fueled by dopamine.

You’ll jump in head first when you’re into a woman, which will either push her away or leave you 90-days in realizing she’s not the right woman for you.

Getting out of this cycle is impossible without subconscious work.

When you understand your programming, specifically as a high-achiever, you can make subtle shifts to your subconscious beliefs to create massive changes in your dating life.

This is the work that I’ve used to help CEOs, thought leaders, physicians, founders, and executives attract their dream woman.

5. Stop performing and start embodying your natural masculine energy

If you want a woman who has core feminine energy, who’s nurturing, playful, sweet, open, and supportive, you have to integrate into your masculine energy.

Polarity can only happen when two people are in opposite energies – masculine and feminine.

When you’re not integrated into your masculine energy you’ll attract women who are in their masculine energy, or even wounded masculine, who feel guarded and stiff, and not be able to connect with women in their feminine energy.

Your two biggest roadblocks when trying to embody masculine energy are:

  1. You’re confusing masculine energy with force and control, putting too much pressure on yourself to try and get a woman into her feminine energy

  2. You try to portray what you think masculine energy looks like (planning dates, initiating communication, being confident), while having no internal leadership skills to stand on

When you rewire your thought patterns about masculine energy, you stop performing and getting put in the friendzone.

Becoming your unique embodiment of masculine energy draws in your perfect match.

With a laid out plan, you can quickly access this part of you and attract your dream woman the show-stopper who is also kind-hearted, driven, and self-aware.

But you have to first make a decision to stop acting passively in dating.

You have to stop waiting for the right woman to come around and just hoping your self-sabotaging patterns magically stop.

A high-value woman, a woman who’s going to bring out the best in you and enhance your life, is looking for a man who’s intentional.

And no matter how successful you are in business, when you’re trying to “wing” finding your dream woman, the woman who can influence the trajectory of your life, she doesn’t feel safe opening up to you.

When a woman feels comfortable opening up to you, you give her an experience most men can’t.

This is when she wants more of you and the two of you can become best friends who are also wildly attracted to each other.

If you’ve read this far, it’s because you’re a man who knows that an extraordinary partnership is worth effort (notice I say effort, not work).

You’re also the type of man who’s willing to get outside of his comfort zone, develop deeper self-awareness, invest in himself, and understand how to see things through a woman’s eyes.

And that’s all I need from you to make your dating life do a 180.

I’m going to give you the rest.

My signature course, Masculine in Love, takes you through my four-step process to become authentically confident in dating and attract your dream woman.

These frameworks have already helped thousands of men get everything they desire in love, like…

💙 Trevor, who was always worried about being a creep or getting rejected and is now in a healthy relationship with his dream woman, who is absolutely beautiful and shares his core values.

💙 Mason, who struggled to overcome his avoidant tendencies in dating and is now in a secure and loving relationship with his dream woman (who he now lives with!).

💙 Adam, who was frustrated that even after doing so much work on himself, he still didn’t have the girl and is now in a relationship with his dream woman.

💙 Matt, who felt insecure with women and could never attract the woman he actually wanted and is now in a relationship with a gorgeous, accomplished woman he never imagined possible.

It’s your turn to have it all – the life, the success, and the dream woman.

Let’s make this summer the one you meet her!

Join Masculine in Love

And, if you’re looking for more personalized guidance to accelerate your results and attract her even quicker, I have two VIP coaching spots available. 

Apply now to see if we’re a good fit for one-on-one mentorship.

Apply to Become a VIP

Until next time!

Emily Freeman Coaching Signature

It’s my mission to help men realize their true potential in dating & relationships. I know what it’s like to desire partnership so badly but question if you’ll ever get it. It doesn’t have to be this hard. I’m so grateful I’m the one who gets to show you how fun and fulfilling love can be.

Emily Freeman

It’s my mission to help men realize their true potential in dating & relationships. I know what it’s like to desire partnership so badly but question if you’ll ever get it. It doesn’t have to be this hard. I’m so grateful I’m the one who gets to show you how fun and fulfilling love can be.

Back to Blog

Previous Issues of The Newsletters

5 Ways to Stay Out of the Friendzone

5 Ways to Stay Out of the Friendzone

July 17, 20249 min read

You don’t get put in the friendzone by every woman, just the women you’re actually into.

Which almost feels worse.

You start to question if you’re going to have to lower your standards to find love.

Every time you hear “You’re a great guy, but…” from a woman who seemed interested at one point, you start bargaining with yourself. The thought crosses your mind, "Should I just be okay with potentially being single forever or date a woman I’m just not that into?"

The true answer is – neither. At least not on my watch.

But if you stay in this mindset, you’re going to get yourself into a disheartening cycle of “no’s” and “not now’s.”

You’re way too good of a guy to not get your dream woman.

She deserves YOU! The type of man who can make her feel so loved, safe, and special.

But you’ll keep missing out on her when you don’t understand what creates polarity with a high-value woman.

When you understand how to create safety and attraction simultaneously, without playing games or using tactics, you stop getting stuck in your head, second-guessing every text you send, and treating her like your girlfriend way too soon.

Connecting with your dream woman from a place of authentic confidence is the only way to build a lasting relationship with her.

You know when you hear men say, “We just had this natural connection, it felt effortless”?

That’s what you can have when you follow these five ways to stay out of the friendzone.

1. Focus on connection, not affirmation

The top thing blocking polarity with your dream woman is neediness. And the number one display of neediness is searching for affirmation.

A woman will feel your need for affirmation when you…

  • Wait for her to text you first to see if she’s interested

  • Give her a compliment or gift or tell a joke to try and get her to like you

  • Try to follow the “rule book” to gain her affection

  • Ask her where she wants to go or what she wants to do to avoid making a decision

  • Texting or calling her because you worry she'll forget you or end up with another guy

  • Making jokes about physical contact to see if she gets the “hint” and makes a move herself

When you ask her to affirm you throughout the dating process, she doesn’t feel led. And when she doesn’t feel led, she isn’t able to relax and get into her more playful and flirtatious sides where polarity naturally builds.

When you focus on connecting with her, you can confidently lead the dating process and inspire her to open up.

To create moments of connection, you have to first identify what it is you want in a partner and how to qualify her to see if she fits what you’re looking for.

Next, you need to segment these desires into “needs for affirmation” and “desires for connection” by asking yourself – What do I hope to gain from this interaction?

2. Lead from your desires

If you’re a “by the book” kind of guy, this one’s for you. We’re throwing out dating rules because they only keep you stuck in your head, which is your problem to begin with.

The most attractive thing a man can do is go after his desires with authentic confidence. To do this, you have to stop downloading texting books and take accountability for your own choices.

So once you’ve identified what your desires are in dating (refer back to #1), it’s time to live them out.

Sounds simple enough. But here’s where you will get tripped up.

We all have what’s called negativity bias. And when you haven’t been able to get or sustain the relationship you want, your inclination to look out for signs it won’t work out will be high.

If you notice that every time you try and lead from your desires you talk yourself out of it or do it and then get friendzoned, it’s because of your limiting beliefs.

Your limiting beliefs are thoughts and stories you’ve inherited over time that have created your “truth” or the way you see the world.

But just becuase you think it doesn't actually make it true.

When your subconscious limiting beliefs are at odds with your conscious desires, you’ll continue to push away the women you want the most.

This is why I take all my clients, whether they're in a customized VIP private program or in Masculine in Love, through a rewiring process first.

The process is simple. But until you do it, your dating efforts won’t change your results.

3. Step into “chosen energy”

Do you ever find as soon as you start dating a woman other women notice? Or how when your work schedule gets busier you have an easier time getting to the third date with women you’re into?

This is because you’re harnessing “chosen energy.”

High-value women are attracted to men who have options. This doesn’t mean you need to have women chasing after you. Your options don’t have to just be other women.

You access your chosen energy when you have priorities outside of pursuing her that are inspiring and mission-building in your life.

A lot of men confuse this with not caring. This is why you’ll hear the false advice, “She’ll come into your life when you stop caring.”

A woman may come into your life when you stop caring, but she likely won’t be the right one.

Remember, being intentional is the top thing a high-value woman will look for.

When you don’t care, you attract women who chase. Women who chase are emotionally unavailable, in wounded feminine or masculine energy, and have unregulated insecure attachment tendencies.

It’s not about caring less about her, it’s about caring less about her affirmation and more about seeing if she fits into the life you’ve worked so hard to create.

4. Avoid the “Dopamine Dating Cycle”

One of the biggest traps I see high-performing men get into in dating is the “Dopamine Dating Cycle.”

When you’re in this cycle, it can feel like you’re into control.

Any time a woman friendzones you, you brush it off quickly and go on the hunt for another date.

And any time you notice a woman seems interested in a relationship with you, you start to question if she’s the right one for you.

It’s not that you’re afraid of commitment. You want a relationship with the right woman.

But it just feels like you can’t find her.

And you won’t when your dating life is fueled by dopamine.

You’ll jump in head first when you’re into a woman, which will either push her away or leave you 90-days in realizing she’s not the right woman for you.

Getting out of this cycle is impossible without subconscious work.

When you understand your programming, specifically as a high-achiever, you can make subtle shifts to your subconscious beliefs to create massive changes in your dating life.

This is the work that I’ve used to help CEOs, thought leaders, physicians, founders, and executives attract their dream woman.

5. Stop performing and start embodying your natural masculine energy

If you want a woman who has core feminine energy, who’s nurturing, playful, sweet, open, and supportive, you have to integrate into your masculine energy.

Polarity can only happen when two people are in opposite energies – masculine and feminine.

When you’re not integrated into your masculine energy you’ll attract women who are in their masculine energy, or even wounded masculine, who feel guarded and stiff, and not be able to connect with women in their feminine energy.

Your two biggest roadblocks when trying to embody masculine energy are:

  1. You’re confusing masculine energy with force and control, putting too much pressure on yourself to try and get a woman into her feminine energy

  2. You try to portray what you think masculine energy looks like (planning dates, initiating communication, being confident), while having no internal leadership skills to stand on

When you rewire your thought patterns about masculine energy, you stop performing and getting put in the friendzone.

Becoming your unique embodiment of masculine energy draws in your perfect match.

With a laid out plan, you can quickly access this part of you and attract your dream woman the show-stopper who is also kind-hearted, driven, and self-aware.

But you have to first make a decision to stop acting passively in dating.

You have to stop waiting for the right woman to come around and just hoping your self-sabotaging patterns magically stop.

A high-value woman, a woman who’s going to bring out the best in you and enhance your life, is looking for a man who’s intentional.

And no matter how successful you are in business, when you’re trying to “wing” finding your dream woman, the woman who can influence the trajectory of your life, she doesn’t feel safe opening up to you.

When a woman feels comfortable opening up to you, you give her an experience most men can’t.

This is when she wants more of you and the two of you can become best friends who are also wildly attracted to each other.

If you’ve read this far, it’s because you’re a man who knows that an extraordinary partnership is worth effort (notice I say effort, not work).

You’re also the type of man who’s willing to get outside of his comfort zone, develop deeper self-awareness, invest in himself, and understand how to see things through a woman’s eyes.

And that’s all I need from you to make your dating life do a 180.

I’m going to give you the rest.

My signature course, Masculine in Love, takes you through my four-step process to become authentically confident in dating and attract your dream woman.

These frameworks have already helped thousands of men get everything they desire in love, like…

💙 Trevor, who was always worried about being a creep or getting rejected and is now in a healthy relationship with his dream woman, who is absolutely beautiful and shares his core values.

💙 Mason, who struggled to overcome his avoidant tendencies in dating and is now in a secure and loving relationship with his dream woman (who he now lives with!).

💙 Adam, who was frustrated that even after doing so much work on himself, he still didn’t have the girl and is now in a relationship with his dream woman.

💙 Matt, who felt insecure with women and could never attract the woman he actually wanted and is now in a relationship with a gorgeous, accomplished woman he never imagined possible.

It’s your turn to have it all – the life, the success, and the dream woman.

Let’s make this summer the one you meet her!

Join Masculine in Love

And, if you’re looking for more personalized guidance to accelerate your results and attract her even quicker, I have two VIP coaching spots available. 

Apply now to see if we’re a good fit for one-on-one mentorship.

Apply to Become a VIP

Until next time!

Emily Freeman Coaching Signature

It’s my mission to help men realize their true potential in dating & relationships. I know what it’s like to desire partnership so badly but question if you’ll ever get it. It doesn’t have to be this hard. I’m so grateful I’m the one who gets to show you how fun and fulfilling love can be.

Emily Freeman

It’s my mission to help men realize their true potential in dating & relationships. I know what it’s like to desire partnership so badly but question if you’ll ever get it. It doesn’t have to be this hard. I’m so grateful I’m the one who gets to show you how fun and fulfilling love can be.

Back to Blog

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© Copyright 2024 All Rights Reserved Emily Freeman Coaching

Privacy Policy | Terms

By submitting your information you agree to receive SMS and email notifications from Emily Freeman Coaching, Inc. as seen in our Terms and can opt out of SMS by replying 'stop'.